We were asked to write a blog about how we felt before leaving on this mission trip. Here's what I'm expecting.
More than anything, I expect to find a more solidified answer as to whether or not missions is a long-term commitment that God wants me to make. It's been an idea floating around in my head for several years, but lately I've been fuzzier than ever about what to pursue during and after college. I know that this experience begins just two weeks after I turn 18, and that seems young to be trying to figure out what I'm called to do in the long-term, but I don't need specifics. I'm just looking for God to point me in one direction or another.
I would like the experience to reveal my strengths and allow me to cultivate them, and also to reveal my weaknesses so that I will be able to grow over the two months and the time following. Having definition in my strengths and weaknesses has always been difficult as I have always participated in the same kinds of activities over and over again, so I pray that this opportunity shows the good and bad in my character to allow growth.
On a less spiritual level, I expect to become more independent through the two months away from the commodities I've grown up with. Throughout my 17.5 years of life, I have never been away from my house for more than 1 and a half weeks at a time. I have never moved, I have never gone over a week without my mom's cooking, and I have never had the opportunity to minister to anyone without direct supervision and instruction. I have never been on the other side of the world, and I have never been too far away for a daily phone call to the people I love. My life has been relatively sheltered thus far, and I am definitely looking to expand my horizons through experiencing two months in an impoverished country. If I leave as a teenager, I would like to return feeling like a mature and slightly more independent adult.
Last, I want to leave knowing that someone is going to remember Jesus because of me and my teammates. I don't quite know how to write a paragraph about that. It is what it is. If Jesus could become a more prominent member of the society in Kenya because of something I say, I think I might be satisfied for the entire duration of my remaining years of life.
I firmly believe that no matter what my expectations are for this trip, God has expectations of His own and I will have to wait to see what He has planned. But having this outline gives me a good idea of what to strive for once I get there.
